Rather unemotional lately. Or maybe it's too emotional that I really can't tell. I got a text from Dave and it basically just depressed me. He quoted .45 by Shinedown and basically bothered me for a good part of the morning. And for some reason, when I think about it, I get more and more bothered. I guess it's the fact that for the first time in a few months, I remembered why I hated myself. That's pretty bad since I really haven't hated myself in a good while. I thought that I was doing okay. I mean, sure, I'm jobless and pretty much useless, but I thought that I stood a chance. I guess I was wrong since these feelings are still buried deep inside of me never letting me go. I actually wanted to cut again and I don't quite understand why. Just...why?! I know I haven't talked to my family in a while. That could be it. Or maybe it's the fact that I'm almost twenty-two years old and still a worthless piece of shit with the mind set of a fourteen year old. I really don't understand it. It could also just be my period and I'm really, really moody. Usually that is what it is. But can't I stop being moody just this once? I also need new headphones cause I fucking lost one of the damn plastic things off them. wtf? I fucking hate my life. ~the karma has snuck up to me Kayla