12:15 Very Early Thursday Morning   Being Someone I'm Not I wish I had someone to confide in who isn't Caleb. I mean, of course i confide in Caleb, but when he's not around or when it's girly things that he just wouldn't 'get,' it would be nice to have someone to sit there with me, heads close together, hashing out whatever it is that is on our minds. Anyway I had 3 exams today. I feel ok about them but I'm scared that I messed up without realising and failed. I failed an ecology assignment and I hate myself for it. I feel really depressed today for a lot of reasons. It was good to get out of my house tonight and hang out with Marie for a little while. I am scared she'll leave me because I'm not cool like her sorority friends; is that not totally middle school mentality of me? She's really funny. I feel like I have a friend...but I also feel like I'm clingy and like, what's the word, tag-a-long or something. I don't know. Lately, I feel rather bereft of close friends, I feel lonely and isolated. I thought college was supposed to be this amazing fun time with parties scattered between studying... I need to move out of this stupid house. I love my family but I crave independence. it's official; I'm insane. I don't know what I want! I talk about myself incessantly. Well what do you expect, it's my diary. I like to talk about my feelings. I definitely have enough feelings to talk about. right now i am sad because Caleb left but happy because I'm talking to Tom. i want a friend really badly.