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Feeling: concerned

The boss eats spam or even canned fish for breakfast sometimes and it stinks up the whole office. The clients just don't deserve that. Heck, I don't even deserve that. Thankfully I had an orange with me. I open that thing up and it smelled like oranges all day long. It was so juicy and the smell stuck to my fingers permanently basically. mmm, much better than what he had for breakfast for sure.

I decorated my office with christmas lights and my chocolate count down to Christmas tree and a dinky lil' tree on the desk. Mm smells and tastes like Christmas, looks like Christmas, just need it to hear it and see it now. mwhaha

I came home to find the garbage overflowing because someone decided to stick a gallon milk carton in it. I was slightly frustrated and pulled it out so I coudl put something else in the garbage and I complained "Is this really necessary?!" And Erin replies "No, it is not. Are you upset Wednesday?" hah. I was a lil'. Then I went to cook spaghetti and found those decorative mats that you put between pans so they dont touch each other or whatever had been like completed melted. I could only find one half of one of the mats. For reals? And they put it back in the pan even though there's only one half of it left? You can't melt/burn something and throw the evidence away? Then I had flashbacks of my christmas mug broken into pieces placed carefully on the counter. For reals?

Well, if you can't guess its not me or Erin. Its our older, supposedly more mature roommate Julie that does these things to our kitchen. Now that I think about it, she did use the kitchen (for its purposes of cooking) for the first time since she moved in, as far as I know, a few days ago. I'm wonderin the day we'll find one half of a burnt hand towel or something. The things you'd have to do to get the results I've seen in that kitchen.

So it turns out that Julie is moving out. It sounds like she just needs her own place, her own kitchen, a bigger warmer bedroom, maybe even her own garage/carport. She wanted us to share the garage a couple weeks ago, which is fine if we can figger out a diff payment arrangements cuz we both pay to park in the garage. Her room is cold cuz of the sliding door right there. Her bathroom is a sea of hair and plunging mishaps (her own fault) and she apparently wants her own kitchen....not that she'd use it from what I've seen. She's willing to pay lots more to get away from us it sounds like. hah. Its sad she thinks its weird with us, but at the same time maybe its a good thing we can save the kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom before she continues to treat it the way she is.

She's moving out at the first of January. We'll need to get a new roommate and I'm soo going to disinfect that whole bathroom. You have no idea. I've wanted to video tape the disgusting things I've seen in that room. Mainly the layers of hair on the floor you have to wade in to get to the tiolet. We'll have to find some way to get rid of the smells.... we'll have to find them first....

I'm not frustrated that she does these things to the condo, its not like permanent or important damage, it just frustrates me that this is a grown woman, with grown children, with her own house, etc and she can't properly take care of things let alone herself and other human beings. Its not a mental disease, its not a handicap of some kind, its simply a womans inability and lack of knowledge of how to take care of themselves and their things.

In other definitions she does the same thing over and over again and expects different results. Example: Whatever she does to plug up the tiolet every other day...she keeps doing it and she keeps having to plunge it! Its insanity!

In other news, Brian came over yesterday also. I've decided he's not that fun to hang out with anymore. He has become very...selfish in my eyes and I do not wish to make anymore effert to be his friend as he 'expects' me to. I always end up being his taxi driver which irks me. He wanted to talk yesterday, I said I would be at home he could come and talk, he said okay, I went home, he asked 'how do I get to yer house?', I said I dunno, he suggested he take Trax, I asked where he was taking Trax from, and he said downtown, (Wait, hold up, you expected me to go all the way downtown to pick you up and bring you Sandy before you got this genious idea of taking Trax? What the what?), I said I'd pick him up at the station, an hour later he shows up, he gets in my car and hints that he's hungry by suggesting places to eat as I continue to drive home.

It sounds horrible, but many many times throughout the night I just had this plain and simple thought of "I don't care what he wants/thinks/expects, etc". Its obvious that he's hungry, but I dont want to take him around town for fast food, I go to ask him what he wants to do and I find that I dont care what he wants, he's watching a movie, I go to ask what he's thinkin and I find that I dont care I would rather sit in silence at that moment. I go to ask him when he wants to go home and I find I dont care, I'll take him home when I darn well wanna. It seems I've turned into the selfish person.

His purpose was to come over and talk, moreso complain, and vent on the drama he deals with every day as if he's still in highschool as if I care or have any advice for him. But I put on a movie and sat him in front of the TV and went to the kitchen to cook. Now that I think about it, these are actions a mother would do to a child to get the kid to ...shut up, be preoccupied, or just have a break for awhile. I'd come out and watch bits and pieces of the movie, brought his food out, and ate with him. He's a black hole and I knew it wasnt enough food so I made more, I kept feeding him til the movie was over. Then I went downstairs in the study to wrap some presents and then I laid down and closed my eyes for like 30 minutes with him like...staring at me and nothing to do. And when I wanted to go to sleep for reals I took him home.

That night was all about me. Well, besides feeding him all night. And it was nice not to feel bullied, expected to do something else, pushed or whatever to do other things for his benefit.

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