Jesus crist, i am getting sick again >_< i hate being sick. I hate the way i feel, and just uggggghhh. I want to go to school, but i don't. Everyone feels that way, but i would put up with mrs solorzano, and math, just to see my friends, and John. sheesh why does it suck to be a teenager? well i know for a fact that its not going to get any better when i am older. I should enjoy this, this carefree age i am in now. Soon i am going to have to get a job, finish school, support myself, and possibly a family. Its going to get alot harder, but i still think that someday, when i am older, maybe i will be treated with the respect i deserve. I mean people look at me, and see a 16 year old. They look at my age, and don't even think that i would know a couple of things about responsiblity and how hard life is going to be. I am looking forawrd to christmas break, but i am not. there are so many reasons why, and i don't even want to talk about it. When ever i think about it, it makes me feel alot worse. I think of things i am not going to be able to deal with, and how hard life is going to get. i just don't want to loose myself. Thats all i am going to say about that, i don't really ramble on about my feelings in a non-private entry, but all of you get a peek at how i am feeling right now. I am so happy, but very unhappy at the same time. all for different reasons. I just need someone to hold me and say everything is going to be ok. man, i hope i don't have the flu or anything. bahhh