January first.

The whole year is stretched out in front of me.

Everything's possible again. Anything's possible.

I like this day.

New Years turned out better than originally thought, even if Maegan cancelled on me at the last minute. I went down to Niagara Falls with Josh and my Dad, and we ate food and talked about space, and got free parking, and walked, and saw Styx. There was a countdown, and fireworks. I've never been out in public with a thousand other people for the New Year, but I liked it. It wasn't too cold, or too rainy, or anything.

I can't find my computer cord and it's driving me insane. Augh. I just want to put my pictures on facebook, why is that so hard?

I should really get out of bed and clean my room. Start the year off on a good note, I suppose. I want to go shopping, but I shouldn't, because I need to save money otherwise I'm going to be in trouble again, and how will I get to Paris then?

I really want to go to Paris.

I really hope, honestly, that maybe they can forgive, if not forget. I know that's something I'm more than capable of, as I would clearly not still be living here if I wasn't, but.

I don't know. I just know I can't keep doing this if this is going to keep happening. I love playing Kat more than almost anything else, and I love what I've done with her, and I love where I've taken her since this whole thing started, and how she's changed and grown up, and morphed into something that I didn't even expect, and how much fun I've had getting her there, but I cannot keep doing this.

I've never threatened to quit, in my whole five years here. And I guess this isn't a threat, but a reality.

Sometimes I think I should quit anyways. Think of what I could do with all my spare free time. I'm sure I could finish a book, because just in the past two weeks, not having a proper outlet for my writing is driving me insane, and making me want to start another story, which I shouldn't. But I might.

Resolutions?
-Apply for University. I have good feelings about doing this, but I just have to get it done.
-Go to Europe again
-Go visit Katey if I can't get to Europe. It's about time, I think. 2010 was supposed to be the Year Of Meeting Each Other anyways.
-Maybe start actually exercising. And stop eating at McDonalds.

2009, in terms of my life, was a banner year, the kind of year I want to have all the time. The good things I did far outweighed the bad things that happened, and for once...for once I think I spent more time smiling than crying. Nobody died. People are getting married. I had fun, I was spontaneous, I went on dates, I got out of my comfort zone, and I got comfortable with myself.

I don't wonder who I am anymore. I don't torture myself at night with thoughts of trying to become who I want to be, or wondering why I'm not good enough. I am good enough. I am exactly who I've always wanted to be.

My name is Katie Hatcher, and 2010 is going to be good to me.

~Katie