ughh.. I feel I cant trust ANYBODY right now.. only ppl in Jersey. I want to go visit up there for a bit.. and just get away from here. I want to be by true friends again... I havent had a true friend... since.... about a year and a half ago... And the more I think... the more the ppl I am trusting now... I am starting not to trust them because of certain ppl who just dicked me over.. and I get all these conclusions in my head.. like.. what if these ppl are just letting me think I can trust them.. but... then they just go ahead to the other ppl who dicked me over and telling them everything... erghhh.. I dont like this at all... In NJ... I had sooo many ppl who were true to me. but here.. I cant seem to find one anymore.. ughh.. I miss it so much.. I feel as if NJ ripped a peice of my heart out.. and Im somewhat stuck there in time... I always refer back to there. I miss it so much. I miss all my friends.. I could always count on them.. and always trust them with things.. and here... I cant turn to anybody.. without thinking they might back stab me any more... its just all so complicated.. and I guess it didnt help at all.. when I was talking to my aunt about it.. and she told me that when she moved.. it took Jess (my cousin) THREE years to find true friends... I dont want to hafta wait that long.. :'(. I just want my old friends back. and If any of you supposed friends read this... You should partly understand why I cant trust you... and I know we supposedly made up... but.. Ive been thinking more about it lately.. and I fell I can't get over it that fast... and so.. If i ignore you.. then.. I just dont feel like talking.. or I have been thinking even more... later. but yea.. ughh.. I miss Jenn.... :(. Jenn, I love you! I can't wait to see you again! At the football game last night... I could have sworn I saw your dad... and then he started waving at me... and then.. all I thought about was you.. I miss you so much! :'( well.. ttyl. byez. :'( Nicole! :'(