tonight. all i know is im really not ready to leave right now. can i pleeeeaaassseee just have one more day? oh well. the night started off fun. me monique and shelby and friends went to the mall for dinner, and shopped a little. monique is a funny kid. jeeze. i love shelby too. yaya shelby :). anyways. i dont want to leave damn it... but ill be leaving with something...ill be leaving with satisfaction. ill be leaving with the feeling that people care. that i should just let go of things that hurt me... let go of things that make no sense. i had no reason to hang on to colin...he treated me like shit and i didnt have a reason to be so unhappy. i mean, i know i had feelings for colin...feelings beyond my years....but i really should have known that i was taking it too seriously. im way over it. maybe when i get back to ventura ill be like what the hell im not over this?!?! but for now, while im satisfied with what i have...this is what it is. im in a dream. reality is ahead ofme...bring it on. im ready for it. im ready as ill ever be...cant wait. i most definatly have stories to tell. too bad the boy of my dreams lives here...but oh well. people always say things are always too good to be true. i now know that they are taling about. ill live with it. like i said, bring it on. xoxo amanda