- this entry speaks for itself.... i had a harsh realization of what was happening in my life. i lost the one person that cared for me, the only person who loved me for me. and since then my life has been nothing but an emotional rollercoaster. ive lost friends, made wrong choices..the whole kit 'n' caboodle(so to say). im seeing a side of myself that i hate, and i cant find a way to rid myself of the depressive feelings i have hidden in me. and, it may be the hardest thing to hear your best friend say the worst things about you, but in the end those words will only make you stronger.. i might not have realized it at the time. but whats a girl to do when the man she loves is telling her how much he hates her and how much he loves another gurl now. i just want to find that happy gurl that i once knew. the carefree, happy, loving, nice, "good" girl that everyone loved.. well .....time to go sit alone in the dark and listen to the music that drowns away the pain and the sorrow that i feel from having a broken heart