My friend Ingrid helped me make this diary. We sat on her computer listened to Hanson and talked about our love for Nathan. -- Its weird to think back to those days.. compared to where I am now. I'm grown, for sure, no doubt, but to what extent have I?

Any major changes in those six years?:

+I grew boobs!

+I got my period-- which everytime that I do now, I think of how much easier it'd be if I were a boy.

+I got braces.

+Had many many crushes.. and lets be real (crushes only crush you)

+Experienced Highschool, which I barely remember now, but not because of external reasons, only because it was so boring and unnecessary.

+Completed my first year of college at SU, and now am in progress with my sophomore year!

+Removed braces!!! YAY.

+Drank for my first time --- and consequently threw up my first time.

+Randomly made out with a stranger in a bar my sister snuck me into in bellingham for our b-days

+My first boyfriend.. and he was perfect, just not for me...

+My first break up and only so far.

+Loved and lost (just once).. but did I "love"? i still don't know actually.

+Been overworked- overstressed.

+Found love in writing poetry.

+Discovered that no matter what situation I'm in.. Ray Lamontagne, Bon Iver && KiD CuDi will help me through it.

+I grew taller, I stayed small.

+I laughed louder, loved easier and smiled bigger.

+Experienced what I now only refer to as TOGA night.. it involved too much drinking, throwing up, changes shirts with Todds cousin and leaving my shit in a FRAT.. can you say EPIC FAIL?BAHAHA

+Basically,I learned more about me.

This isn't everything but it is something.. You've witnessed most of it SitDiary. You have healed me by letting me express all my thoughts, with an unbiased position. Like I said before.. I love that you always let me come back..No judgements, you're always waiting for me to come back and expound on the changes, to analyze the minute details, to pine, to cry, to breathe, to write. Only honest thoughts survive here, only the purest..You've healed me in so many ways, this is my thank you to you.. ♥

Always,

Samantha.

P.S.-- I now know I cannot delete you, it'll be impossible and involve pathetic goodbyes. Here's to six more lova! :D

i look at you