Dear Diary, I still can't believe it!!! Me, Laurie L., the planiest, most boring girl at Pinole Valley High School, the girl that all the boys bark at when i walk by, the girl whoes mother wouldn't even let her go to a New Kids on The Block concert because "there's often a bad element at those rock concerts dear," I got to go on a four day tour with my total hearthrobs, GREEN DAY!!!! Little did I know that when i entered that "Win A Dream Date With Green Day" contest in Tiger Beat Magezine (my lame-o brother calls it Puberty Beat, but what does he know, he's probably a homo anyway) that i out of a million other Green Day fans in America would get picked. The day that letter arrived was the happiest day of my life. But before i could get too excited, i relized i had a biig problem...my parents!! I knew they would never let me go off with a rock band for even one night let alone a whole four days! So for once i decided to not put up with their crap. Though i wasn't quite sure whatb to do so the next day at school i went around to all the weirdos and asked them what THEY would do? See, i figuer people who have blue mohawks and only come to school when they feel like it and make those gross magizines with naked pictures in them would have found out some way to put up with their parents. So i went to this guy Eggplant(boy i feel sorry for him, his parents must have really hated him to name him something like that)and he looked at me like, "You really want to go on tour with Green Day?" And i said, "I would die to go on tour with Green Day." He looked at me kinda funny and said,"But would you KILL?" I thought he was joking, but i wasn't sure. Then i looked into his beady little eyes pircing into my soul and i KNEW he wasn't. I thought HMMMMMMM, what the hell, you only go around once, mite as well go for it, Blah blah blah.. And then i spoke up hoursly and said,"Yeah I guess I would.." and he said, "then the one you want to talk to is Claude." Omigod!!! Even I have heard of Claude. He's so evil he's almost...Satanic!! He dropped out of school in eigth grade and all he ever does is take drugs, read weird magizines, and molest little girls, i was always afraid to even look at him. But i had gone to far to stop now. After school instead of going right home i went to Telegraph Avenue in Berkly where all the scummy people hang out, and sure enough, Claude was there. He looked all perverted and was smoking all these cigereetes and all these girls were standing around him like they wanted him to do bad stuff to them. But they got out of the way when they saw me coming, and claude wasn't mean or dirty or anything. He was actully kinda nice. He said,"My friend Eggplant tells me you have a problem." I said,"twwo problems actully. Two really big problems." "parents huh? this ought to take care of them." He Handed me a brown bottle of pills "how many of these should i take?" I asked him. He laugheed kind of heheh like,"no don't take them They take them."