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Emotionally- Lee |
March 28th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: None
Feeling: ambivalent
And we've got a whole lot of excuses
And a whole lot of reasoning..
I'm so used to it all..
I've just stopped listening.
Useless as it is,
I tune in from time to time
People always got something in your ear
..that's when I realize, it's time to say goodbye
Why do I need the same ole [in and out] routine?
Why do I need someone who doesn't want me for me?
Why would I want..my heart to be dropped and stepped on?
Faith is the test of time, and commitment I'm now willing to make.
And it's weird because trust was the hardest thing
Lost so easily, gained hardly
And I feel like you compromised me for it
But, what can I say? Decisions others have to make
But in it, you made me wonder
What it is.. and then tried to restore order
But once you've lost
How do you expect me to keep going?
Compromise me or compromise you? Who am I more willing to choose?
Most importantly, who am I more willing to lose?
Maybe not me, and sorta-kinda-definitely not you?
And I thought..I thought I had grew.
But..what is it I'm fighting for?
And what am I gaining my trusting you more?
See she's all in your favor..
But my emotions..are emotionally torn
Your hearts on your sleeve,
My shirt was torn
Love is like a child
My baby is un-born.
Now tell me..who am I willing to risk more?
Who..in reality, do I trust more?
In my mind..I'm gone..mentally floored
So, who, in the end, do I fight for?
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| 42 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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I'm back! |
January 15th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill
Feeling: eager
It took me forever to find the
*NEW ENTRY* button.
I think I'll be back at Sit for a while. However, I do have Xanga and MySpace just in case you guys need me and I decide to disappear like I did.
http://www.xanga.com/changed_clothes
http://www.myspace.com/truthful_image
Was crazy, wasn't it? But I know I love Sit way too much, and as you know, Home Is Where The Heart Is, so you can see how I always flock back, right?
New poem will be posted on: http://www.sitdiary.net/cry
Oh yes, the Lady is backkkkk!!!
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| 32 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Keyboarding Class |
October 10th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: I Think They Like Me (Remix)- Franchize Boys feat/ JD and Bow Wow
Stuff is crazy.
College and school has me seriously stressed.
What's worse? Just now my teacher called me up for Raymond bumping into MY computer! Stuff is crazy, but I'm not trippin. It was sort of funny, really.
Anyways, I need to do my homework for the same teacher tomorrow. Seeing as to how I have her both A and B Days.
Okay, well, time to go seeing as to how both my teacher is looking at me and Maurice is bothering me to do his work. Oh well.
Laters. |
| 33 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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OCTOBER |
October 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Whoa Now- B Rich
Feeling: beautiful
I think today is going to be a good day. I LOVE this song, even though I haven't heard it in forever.
Now I'm listening to Avant- Read Your Mind.
Well, I decided, I have no use for Alex until my birthday..if he remembers, at least that shows me he cares. Anyways, my cousin asked me an interesting question: What does he do to show he loves you???
I couldn't even answer that. So..I don't know.
I think this other guy is great, but he's hung up on his friend. So, I don't know what's going on.
-Lesha
PS Take Away- Ginuwine, Missy Elliot, and Tweet. (The reason the songs keep switching is because I keep catching the end as I switch channels)
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| 30 hit(s) |
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Turn Me Around
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Prayers |
September 29th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: NE-YO feat Peedi Peedi- Stay With Me
Feeling: beautiful
For the first time, my mind is racing. Antoine is always a great conversationist. Somehow, talking to him is sort of easy, sometimes. Then, there are those days when his world just sucks, and I'm sort of scared to even talk to him.
Yesterday, we did Word Association. It was really weird because then we talked about some of our associations..and we were like..hmm.. He said he tried it with a couple of other people, and no one came up with the stuff we came up with. We didn't always come up with the same stuff, though.
He finally got my number (even though we always see each other in school and have talked a little before.) Anyways, I'd write this in my Xanga but this is my Sit and I still love it.
Anyways, I think I really like Antoine. Somehow, my bond with Alex, I feel is broken. I'm really sorry to think that.
-Lesha
P.S. He had this seriously interesting perspective on prayer. I don't know, maybe I'll write it when I get more time. He's finally answered my PM. (Yes, that's what Yahoo! users call an IM. Who'd have thought? Switched Sit for Xanga and AIM for Yahoo!. Weird.) |
| 29 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Banking and Crediting Class |
September 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Typing of others.
Feeling: aggravated
I really shouldn't be online right now. Haha, I'm in class and that's wrong, but..I don't really feel like studying, so if I fail, it's my fault. *God forbid* Anyways, it's time for testing. Thought I'd update, I'll do it when I get home.
-Lesha- |
| 33 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Back to Book [54] |
August 21st, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: And Then What- Youg Jeezy
Feeling: alluring
Well..My lovely Smile told me he "Luv"s me. Aww!! How cute. That loser! Anyways, school for me starts tomorrow. Can I get a "Good luck"? Luv you!
-Lesha |
| 43 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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The Horror!! |
August 9th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Baby I'm back- Baby Bash feat/ Akon
Feeling: guilty
Well, I really intend on spending some more time on Sit. Why in hell I ever abandoned it is beyond me. I think I'm only keeping two regular diaries and two stories. Considering how I have 7 in all, that shouldn't be hard. It will be:
Insidethoughts
Taintedsimple
Dramatized
Cry..and that's it. From time to time, I'll pop in for Husheddreamer, Slambook, and Amayaaloaryn but the pressure of keeping up with my Xanga AND my Myspace has gotten out of control. I can't bare it anymore. Anyways, I love everyone that's left comments and missed me. I'll look forward to reading them more!!
*Cuz baby I'm BACK!!!*
I x3 you DJ!!
-Lesha |
| 39 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Post Chains |
July 30th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
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Girl: hey baby i want to show you....
Boy: ( cutting her off ) ugh i'm so mad
Girl: why? whats wrong ?
Boy: ugh everything
Girl: explain baby
Boy: just lost a championship game,
parents flipped out on me for no reason,
and im catching a cold
Girl: well hey there will always be other games,
you know ill take care of you when your sick,
what your parents flip about ?
Boy: they are making me pay them for a car repair
Girl: is it alot of money
Boy: no it just sucks
Boy: but hey i dont feel well im going to go lay down
Boy: bye
Girl: wait i want to give you some...
Boy: cant it wait til tommorow ?
Girl: yeah sure
Girl: bye
Boy: bye
2 hours later a friend of hers asks her to go for a drive ...she goes.....her friend swerved to avoid a truck....hitting a tree instead her friend was killed instantly....shes in critical condition
This is the conversation between her sister and her boyfriend
Sister: omg ( crying )
Boy: what? whats wrong ?
Sister: my sister...your gf was involved in a major car wreck
Boy: is she ok ? ?????
Sister: shes in critical condition
Boy: i'll be there in 10 minutes
He shows up to the hospital room ...standing outside the door
going over the last conversation in his mind over and over as he
heard the machines beep and beep and breathing tubes pump
Boy: she wanted to give me something or tell me something
Girls mom: yeah this...
it was an envelope smelling like she did sealed with a kiss in lipstick he opened it.....it said ..... your everything to me....i love you with everything i am and everything i have...i want to spend the rest of my life with you sealed in it was a ripped movie ticket from the first movie they went to and the first picture they took together he kissed the picture as a tear fell from his face onto the picture it looked as if in the picture she was crying then the machines flatlined....3 minutes later she was pronounced dead
If you have any heart...any soul...or want to be happy you will repost this.
if you care for someone ...do not let something like this ever happen
Post this in the next 200 seconds and you WILL have THE best day of your life THIS MONDAY. You're number one *love* Will either kiss you, ask you out, or call you or better. If you break this chain you will have a lousy day on Saturday, and you know you canstory thingy. |
| 43 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Slight Truth? |
July 27th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Leela James- Music
Feeling: bubbly
Your Birthdate: December 14
With a birthday on the 14th of the month (5 energy) you are inclined to work well with people and enjoy them.
You are talented and versatile, very good at presenting ideas, and you are also very good at organization and systematizing.
You may have a tendency to get itchy feet at times and need change and travel.
You tend to be very progressive, imaginative and adaptable.
Your mind is quick, clever and analytical.
A restlessness in your nature may make you a bit impatient and easily bored with routine, and rebel against it.
You have a tendency to shirk responsibility.
What Does Your Birth Date Mean?
Your Power Color Is Gold
At Your Highest:
You are engrossed in passions that mentally stimulate you.
At Your Lowest:
You seek thrills and neglect what's important in your life.
In Love:
You see dating as adventure and approach it with an open attitude.
How You're Attractive:
You passion for life makes others passionate about you.
Your Eternal Question:
"Am I Having Fun?"What's Your Power Color?
How You Life Your Life
You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside.
You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think.
You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences.
Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.How Do You Live Your Life?
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| 39 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Wonderous |
July 23rd, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Thinkin of James..
Feeling: amazed
I could get tangled up in you
Don't let my feet hit the floor..I'm just fine being so high. Don't let me come crashing anymore. I'm fine the way I am, just take me as you see..
What other person you know, can make me feel what shouldn't be??
-And I promise, I have no intent on letting go...
*Please God, let James be a keeper.* |
| 59 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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I'm Back, Loves |
July 20th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Ying Yangs feat Mike Jones- Bad Bitch
Feeling: hellagood
Well I feel under the weather a smidge. =. Oh well.
Alex called today. Not like my Twin will read this, who knows ALL about me and would understand that. She never reads stuff anymore. She's always caught up with Joe. I should know, I always stop by to see what she's talking about and what pops up? Joe. All I see is his name. I'm not mad, nor am I bitter. I just figured she'd still have time for me. I thought wrong.
Anyways he called and I ignored it. =). I'm proud of myself. I'm sure Becca would be, too. =.
Anyways, I miss James. It's been about 3 hours since I heard from him. Long time? Nah. I think I'm becoming infatuated. Which is why I can't be mad at Becca for being infatuated with Joe. Moving on, James says he has a secret to tell me. Is that good or bad? He says we'll talk about it later. He hasn't said anything so I text messaged him and what'd I get back? Nothing. I'm worried. Anyways...I might be overreacting. Still, I'd like to get this over with ASAP. |
| 36 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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The Entry Before |
July 10th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Ms Jacki- Jacki- O
Feeling: energized
So, James and I are *okay* I'd suppose. I'm a little upset because I promised last night that I'd leave him a *BUNCH* of messages today while he went to work and I did. I left 12 and he IGNORED them ALL completely because some guy is talking about him. God, can't that wait? I'll be gone for 7 FREAKIN DAYS. Oh well. Whatever.
-So, this is my last entry before Florida. (If they let us go since Hurricane Dennis is trying to do it's damage). Anyways, I won't be updating so that's why. 7 days. I'll be back, and when I do, I'll leave you LOVE like you left ME some.
--Read the entry before this if you want to get pissed off or want to know my all honesty. =). |
| 47 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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African American Child |
July 10th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: NONE
Feeling: betrayed
Well, okay. This has something to do with MY decent. I understand how people can take offense to this, so I apologize ahead of time. It won't stop me from typing it up or loving this poem. So, deal with it.
African American Child
Turn 18 years old and we're legal
Now this is the age of Caucasion's freedom
But we turn this as legal
While we wait to be put in jail cells like we're lethal
Ever notice there are more whites than blacks
Serving on our justice staff?
And yet we get pissed cuz the law just laughed
As Johnny Cochran passed and our law books turned from gray to black
The life of a child with knowledge
Similar to a "child prodigy"
Tell me what you think I want to be
So I can tell you what I will be
They say a test in 3rd grade determined my future
Why is it now that I can make html's and web designs on a white man's computer?
What stops ANY kid from coming up like me?
And changing themselves to better themselves just like me?
How is it you tell me I act a little older than I three
I'm ignorant because of skin tone you see
I'd like you to give me any girl that can match me verbally
I can go tit for tat but with words constantly
So slow it down as I emphasize me for me
I am the product of a black woman with a Master's Degree
And a black man that served his country definetly
But mostly I am the African American's most prized belief:
That an African American female can excel
Without help from a caucasion male
And without pregnancy or a wedding veil
But strictly to prevail
That an African American woman
Can do fine without someone's lending hand
Or giving them a leg because we already learned to stand
And claiming this "white America" as diverse land...
Yes, I admit some of the things might be wild
Yet, Bush showed me anyone can say anything aloud
Even so, I feel I put things rather mild
After all, I am merely nothing more than an,
-"African American Child" |
| 56 hit(s) |
(2 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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Florida [47] |
July 9th, 2005 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: Jaheim- Fabulous
Feeling: bothered
I could start off with all the negative, but I'd rather go to the positive. I'll have everyday to remember ever negative thing that ever happened in my life.
Well, we went to Applebees and they said I could fill out an application at 16..so 5 months and that's where I'll be. =). It's good because I actually want to work.
Moving on, I have no clue how *he* feels about me. I'm not quite sure it matters anymore. He's white, I'm black (not skin-wise for those that only think IN black and white) he's the Olsen Twins, I'm Madonna, He's honey, I'm hot sauce, get me? We're totally different. I think he's more self-inflicted than worried about what I'm doing. I'm not hurt. I'm just accepting. I'm glad I did it before hand.
*By the way, two days before Florida. I don't think I'll be back.... |
| 41 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Turn Me Around
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