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update |
October 28th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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so im going to tafe and is going prtty good.i have meet some really cool people there and made sum good friends.
and one of them is josh.hes 24 and really nice and sweet.me and him get on reallt well,and well we are kinda like seeing each other,and he isnt like sum other guys.he like sat down wit me and was like "i just want to tell u were i stand" cause we had sum probs wit this other girl cause she kinda likes him as well but yer he said that he doesnt like her and if i wanted me could still hook up n stuff n like after this thing at tafe we could get together or wateva.anywayz yer
me n troy well josh has been really helpful wit that like he understands where i am cuming from n y i put up wit all the shit he puts me though.i have been trying so hard not to call troy but i had to yesterday just because he sent me a txt n i had missed calls from him.so i think its best if i dont talk to him anymore or just of a while to see wat happens.cause he alwayz cums bak to me but not this time.
im happy wit josh n he makes things so easy to hard and like i dont have to be sumthing that im not when im wit him.
that was a lil update. |
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new guys ? |
September 10th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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i said the other week that i was sik of all this shit wit troy n dean n i am.they have been ringing me all weekend n fuking me off big time saying shit like ur an emo.
anywayz...
so i had tamaras birthday party on friday it was boring at the start cause me n chatel didnt no anyone else there so there were like groups.anywayz it got better n i had fun in the end.i started talking to this guy n yer well on ended up hooking up.haha
he is a hell gud kisser as well.n cute. n hell sweet.oh n bi.didnt no till last night.not that i care or anything its just fun i think.im not sure if i like him or not.hes 19/20 n an awsome guy to be wit.
anywayz so yer i went out last night told mum i was staying at a friends, n went driving wit him n hes friend.we just parked the car sum where, n talked n stuff it was kool.
so i said i wanted new guys the other day cause im sik of dateing my friends it turns out shit.an well i guess i got wat i wanted.
so hopefuly me n chantel can start hanging out wit them.
yer well i just wanted to update on things.
i want to keep writing in here so that when im older i have sumthing to look bak on.
..................................
R.I.P
two australian icons have died this week.
Monday Steve irwin, and now Peter Brock,
famous aussie racing car driver,
died in a car crash on friday.
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the hole title thing |
August 8th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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well troy dumped me the night after,hes reason is he doesnt feel the same way, i no wat hes talking abou8t cause i feel the same thing,but the diffrance is that i didnt want to let him go cause we both no that we are meant to be together everyone nos it, its just because we have been trough so much together its hard to feel the same,we love each other just not like we did the first time.he talks to me about all most anything n everything, n same here i tell him everything he nos more about me then anyone.i mean the hole reason we are not going out is cause he doesnt want in hole title of "bf,gf" but he still wants to do everything we are doing now, witch is a big ask for me cause it took alot for me to do wat i did in the first place.but i did it cause i love him and alwayz will n he told me the same thing.
i dont no really wats happing wit me n him atm cause i called him last night n he found out i cut, n he hang up on me so i called him bak n asked him y n he goes cause u cut, n i go no i dint, then he asked if i would swear on hes life, n he nos i cant do that n that i have to tell the truth so i said yer i did. n said goodnight n hung up agian.
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hes bak |
August 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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omg dean is back.
aftt all the shit he put me n chantel though and hes bak.
me n troy are really gud n we are like best friends again.and every time dean cums bak he fukes things up between me n troy.
i cried last night cause i dont want to lose troy again not because of dean anywayz.
jess.k said that if dean tries to do anything to me or troys friendship she will kill him.aww shes so cute.
troy doesnt even no that i no yet.cause it was jessk hu told me.
i txted him but he did nt txt bak n i no he cas cred.is this a sign dean has already started to fuk it up?
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here i am once again |
July 30th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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well here i am once again, bak wit troy:) it all started friday he invited me n chantel over hes house, i kinda thourt sumthing might happen but didnt think he would ask me out let alone me ask him out haha.
i was so drunk n well he asked me out n i said no then we went out side alone n hooked up n i asked him out lol didnt think that would happen but it did im so happy callum goes u to were made for each other n trioy goes yer i no..awww i love him so much.
we spent the hole weekend together friend,saturday and sunday.
saturday was the best night eva we talked heapz n told each other wat we really wanted to say n i told him i missed him more then anything.
we that just a lil update on things.
love♥ |
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and here we go again. |
June 26th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
Listening to: best friend.
ok so i just read a comment chantel left me n i mite give this another chance. i havent been on here for so long n so much has changed.
i just read my last entry omg it seems like it ages ago so much has happen.
so lets so were to start.. well me n troy went out 4 a few days after everything happen it was kinda off n on.
but in the end we just didnt work.
me n chantel hooked up wit dean once agian but got into a fight wit hes gf even tho we didnt no he had a gf but oh well chantel is now friends wit her n i kinda am i guess dont really talk to her.
me n chantel had a fight wit troy n dean no longer friends wit dean n well troy it always is changing.
we have became friends wit most the pplz at hjs, simon,jess,steve n more.
we found out that dean is getting married witch was odd. but he is just that kinda person he doesnt even no wat the word love means, or sorry for that matter.
i al going out wit steve atm,after 3days it was gud but then he didnt talk to me n just really seemed like he didnt want to no me, n well troy was telling me how much he missed being wit me n how much he wants to go out wit me agian ,n well he was there n was saying all the right stuff so i hooked up wit him. i no wrong thing to do after everything i have been though i should no better.
i just had my birthday on the 23 june, bad day, we had police here to dust for finger prints cause our house got broke into agian 4 times in 3 weeks. my nana broke her hip while at my house for cake, so then we had the ambo here.then i went out cause it was my bday n i really needed to get of of the house.it was ok i guess nutten really happen.
24 june i stayed at chantels n got piss for everyone, chantel had brake down.awww my poor lil girl. i love her so much i couldnt have gone though wat i have wit out her. :)
i o her so much.
troy told me how much he liked me n that he still loved me.i yelled at him n told my that he should treat me like a friend not like a toy.
anywayz nutten else really to talk about me chantel n troy had fight last week cause he thourt i was gona buy piss n well i didnt.so he had a cry about it.so once again it was just me n chantel.troy told steve i hooked up wit him n at the time he didnt no we were going out other wise he wouldnt have done it.
witch is fuked up cause he knew that night steve ashed me out.all he was trying to do was get him self out of the shit.
anywayz thats about all.steve isnt really talking to me n well i had a cry the other night. i want tot talk to him better but like we mostly just txt n it fuks me off.
comment me xxx
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if he leaves me... |
January 16th, 2006 @ 12:00am |
ok this is a lil update on things...well everything was great for a lil while but i guess i just have bad luck or sumthing cause on friday i found out troy cheated on me witch was way not wat i thourt he would eva do..cause he no how much it hurt me when dean did it...anywayz i went n saw him yeserday n it was kinda fuked up at first cause i didnt no wat to say n well yer im glad chantel n bak too cause she was there..love ya hun! jess was there as well but yer anywayz after like 1hour he asked for a hug so i gave him a hug n it felt really well i dont no like nutten was there like it didnt mean anything and it used to mean so much to me even he said that when he called me last night...anywayz we are still; going out cause i no that he would never do it again, i mean he had done everything wiv me till then cause wehn we started going out he had never even kissed anyone,well thats wat he told me..but i dont no...i still love him so much n like i no i dont trust him right now n i wont for a lil while but i can get over this if he is willing to give it a go...i no he does cause we taked about starting over,so today is monday n we have been going out for 4 weeks..
i need to talk to him 2night n get sum stuff sorted out i was thinking 2day i dont really no where i stand anymore wiv all this n i had this felling like i miss him so much n i dont really no y cause its not like he is anywhere hes right here just i feel like if we dont go out i am going to loss my best friend,cause he said it is hard for him to like be the same way n do the same things as we used to n yer i get that but i dont want to loss him cause i think this could be a really gud thing..that we have/had????
thats the thing i guess i will wait n see wat he says/thinks...
i love the way u look at me
even thou i tell u not to,
and the smile on ur face when u do,
i love it when u call me just to say
"i love you",
the way u put ur hand around me
the way u hold my hand
the way u talk about us getting a house..lol
n how we wil have to by home brand food:)
i love ur eye,n they way u make it hard for me to say no,
i love everything about u but i wish i could tell him all of this but im to scared to let you in n feel the things i feel even thou sumtimes i wish u knew.....
well im sitting here thinking about him again n i just thourt of sumthing i no he hurt me but i think it would kill me if he left me.........
i think i have found the one person that i can truely say i love just wish he knew how much he means to me,he is like my everything n anything to me...ok i sound like some kinda of love sick puppy..lol..hehehe but hey wat can ya do...
oh yer i think i had better talk to tazz n say sorry..i kinda had a go at him on friday for sticking up for troy...lol..im sorry n thankz for beening a gud friend u to shane..loves ya heapz
anywayz i did say this was gonna be a lil update but oh well,love ya alwayz amber xox
love ya troy
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[{::chantel::..}] |
January 1st, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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omg i miss you so much ay...wat ya been up to? me n jess have been doing the same old stuff..
everything is so fuked up i really needed to talk to you the otha day ay..
oh guess wat troy got me a ring its so cute n he is so sweet ay.. n it wasnt even for any reason he just got it...i got him a cross necklace it a really nice one..anywayz read my otha entry so u no wats going on wiv ur brother n me...lol..
i cant wait till u came bak ay cause then i have some to talk to cause like jess doesnt really seem to care n i cant really talk to her about that kinda stuff..
hope u have/had a great new year;s eve! kk well i mite write some more later loves ya hun amba xox
♥ |
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January 1st, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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so nutten new has happen really...troy came over yesterday when mum n dad went out...lol it was heapz funny cause they came home to get something n he had to hide..lol then they went bak out n came home agian..lol..so he went out the bak for a lil bit till they left..lol..then they went out for likr 4 hours..omg i would have been so dead if they found out..
i walked troy to the bus stop n waited wiv him till the bus came then left..when i got home he rang me n said he had one of the best days eva:)i was like aww...i told him to call me at like 10pm so we could talk cause it was new years eve n we werent doing anything so yer..
so he called at like 9 n said he wasnt gonna be able to call cause he was going to a party n yer i dont no i go to him done hook up wiv anyone..n he goes i wont! but for some reason i didnt really believe him.. i think i cause of everything that has happen wiv dean that i dont really trust him well not him all guys..witch is kinda sad..
a lil later he called agian n said that he wasnt gonna go cause he wanted to talk to me...but like 10mins later he said he was so yer i dont no ay..i felt really fuked off about it..
anywayz shane rang me,he was at kings park..anywayz we were taking n i was kinda pissed off n upset n for some reason he could tell n asked me wat was wrong but i said it was nutten...well then i did end up telling him..anywayz he goes i still like u i was like wtf u said the other night u didnt n we had this big fight cause of stuff that was said he goes yer i just said that...i was like wtf? he goes r u gonna break up wiv troy..i was like no he doesnt even no that im upset about anything!
so yer he wants to go out wiv me but yer i dont no wat to do i think i love troy but now i dont no i mean i still like shane a bit..n i have for ages but i dont no..me n troy have only been goin out for a lil while n yer ....
anywayz...me n jess had vodka c's last night n yer it was ok i guess but i would have liked to be out ay...
omg i got a txt from chantel last night i think im gonna wirte an letter to her on my diary lol so she nos wat has been happening n stuff n babe if u read this u write me one to..kk so i no wat ya been up to loves ya heapz amber xox |
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happy new year! |
January 1st, 2006 @ 12:00am |
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