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Friends of Justbreathe
| for good | August 1st, 2008 @ 12:00am |
| by emeraldclaire | |
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Listening to: here in your arms
Feeling: grateful
New scenes New ways Love It's been a while since I've updated. woo! Last semester went wonderfully. I keep growing. And As I go through these new experiences my capacity of happiness and ability to love increases! I do believe trials and tribulations really stretch out my heart so more good and fill in the space. And it's been such a wonderful ride! I remember his last words I shouldn't be spiteful. But they go through my head over and over again And I pity But those words are what motivated me. I called mom shortly after "Mom, wil anyone ever want me? Will anyone ever see me for me and love what they see?" I pitied myself for just a moment. I was near the taylor quad when I heard those last words By the time I reached Carriage House I was a new woman. so thank you, dear friend, for that feeble attempt that completley changed my life. Yes,Thank you! So last semester recap. I made new wonderful friends who completely turned my life around. I met people who actually believe in that movie at the end of our lives...and believes and strives for those certain moments. One would turn to me and say, "that was a total moment! The camera was angled like this!"... Or "I really am excited to see that moment again!" I became close to people I never thought I could. I starved and watched the food network channel. I screamed when I saw that doll head pop up in my window... I am on the 2nd floor. I experiened two of my friends getting engages...and never got steak for it. I found my major and my minor and I believe I'll stick to it. Sociology and marriage and family studies. I regained my love for love and I have a totally different self esteem. my swirl is going up. I bought this new laptop for 500 dollars and it works like a dream. I cried a LOT I became and ambassidor and IREP leader... I broke the rules. And through rocks at doors... I transformed and I'm happy. I'm motivated. I'm moving forward. Oh, and I fell in love mmmm. which love saved my life and I'm eternally grateful. It was almost forbidden. But we let it live. Such a crazy ride! I love that boy even now. Here in your arms-hellogoodbye driving in his truck his hand on my knee he listening to every word I said (or giving the appearence of listening) Long walks overcoming every little thing pushing the button on the climbing wall finding the large water bug and later disposing of it because it turned the container black crazy neighbors who begged for starburst throwing rocks at his door and spraying him with the water gun...he was so proud crossing the railroad tracks and that simple question-"where" haha weekend trips to rigby and IF almost drowning and proving that body heat really is the only way to get warm. those crazy blacklight dances and the loveyoulongtime concert. I really do hope you choke and die. stadium singing and the smell of pickles moments of silence with outbursts of laughter 15 minute naps and studying for hours in that lounge that smelt like moldy clothes birthday wishes and priesthood blessings That trip to G's and tears overflowing Whispered those before taboo words saying goodbye Oh, what a ride we're on. Now pressing on not knowing whats ahead. Florida and RExburg. Bring it on |
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| 341 hit(s) | (1 comments) | I like you |
| Risky love | August 13th, 2008 @ 3:51pm |
| by warrior | |
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A lover is a risk taker Loving children is risky, Marriage is risky, Loving people of other nations is risky, Loving people of the church is most risky. The more we love the more likely we are to get hurt. Jesus took the risk of loving and was crucified for it. But what is not acceptable is for us to hide this beautiful talent of loving in the ground and refuse to take the risk of loving/ We have this treasure Its not about playing safe because the greatest risk is doing nothing at all. So, who is God calling you to love? |
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| 420 hit(s) | (1 comments) | WTF?? |
| Somthing is WRONG!!! | May 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00am |
| by sweetsunrise | |
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I tried to put icons on here and they totally woulnt go on i think it is because of the site thats having technical difficulites so ill be back then everything is fixed Thanks bloggers |
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| 803 hit(s) | (10 comments) | Oh These Icons |
| Bitter | September 30th, 2008 @ 12:30pm |
| by yousayyoucare | |
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Standing alone. Why did you leave? Where did you go? I am alone. Empty. Emotionless. Eyes are blank. Feeling nothing. Seeing everything. Alone. Broken. Why couldn't you see? How could you do this to me? Abandoned. Crushed. Used and thrown aside. Forever alone. Boxed up and put away. Memories fade. Empty shell. Gone. YOU ARE GONE. Why am I alone again? Always alone. Jinxed. Banned to a dark empty world. Forever. Didn't you care? Didn't you want me? Of course not. Beautiful and smart not your style. Never good enough. Always left behind. Never leaving anyone. I am alone again. Forgotten. Always. Passed up for something else. Prettier. Thinner. Sorry, I don't like skeletons. I refuse to be model thin. I am ME. Beautiful. Strong. Confident. Almost. But somehow never enough. Not as ME. Never me. Lied to. Cheating. Faithful to me? Can't be. Honest with me? Don't dare to be. Try to make it work? Too hard. I AM NEVER GOOD ENOUGH. And for what? Someone thin? Beautiful? WHAT DOES IT ALL MATTER? Everyone gets ugly eventually. Get over it. Just let me be me. Don't stop talking. Just because I'm not perfect. I am. Just the way I am. Can't change me. Don't try. Why? I AM ME. Why am I alone? Bitter? Yes. Just a little. Can't trust. Don't believe. It hurts. Don't wanna hurt again. Easier not to fall. There's no shatter at the end. Just want the fairytale. But it has to be real. Nothing fake. I don't do fake. |
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| 62 hit(s) | (0 comments) | Abuse me |
| 405 | December 2nd, 2008 @ 12:06pm |
| by rubberduckiee | |
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As much as I dislike the cold that comes with the snow, I'd really like for it to snow. A pure white blanket over everything. Ah. Makes me think that maybe people really can change, including me. I feel like I'm standing by a window looking out over everything, and can't get to any of it. Sorry, I'm rambling. Don't know where that came from. Hmm. Well, Dallan comes home tomorrow. That's about the only exciting thing for this week. I think that the matchmaking someone tried to do for me a while back is starting to work out on its own. But who knows. I'm not going to go into anything now, but I think its entirely possible that I could date someone. Haha, me. Dating. There's a real knee-slapping joke. It's nice being in the basement room now. I don't have to worry about having my light on and either keeping the parents up or waking the parents up. Plus, that room is TINY. I like it better, strangely enough. Josh asked me the other day if I miss Hollie. Like...do I miss her? He made it sound like she was dead and gone, not married. Nothing's really changed--she still is Hollie, she's just married. We didn't hang out like constantly before she got married anyways, so I can't really say that I miss her. Because nothing has changed in the way that we communicate or anything. I'll sometimes text her, and she may or may not text back. But there is something that I do kind of want to talk to her about, but I don't think I will because...well, just because of something she wrote in her latest entry. I don't want to bug her, don't want to irritate her with fluff. Maybe that's all I am...fluff? I don't know. I don't know what I am anymore...I work, I eat, I sleep. So what am I? |
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| 24 hit(s) | (0 comments) | SPEAK |
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