Feeling: infuriated

Happy One Year Baby ♥

50 hit(s) (2 comments) |   

i'm happy.

really happy.

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the body i want

she has the body i want.. it's just going to take me a little longer to get there...


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not even 5 minutes later
i am crying and drinking.

i tried so hard not to think about it.

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fighting back tears
Listening to: The OC Mix 4
Feeling: distant
i am trying so hard not to deal with/think about the things going on in my life right now. i seem to be doing a pretty good job. there have been only a few moments where i have actually let them cross my mind.

i fight back the tears.. and move on.

fuck. change can be so powerful. i don't deal with it well. i've been moved around so many fucking times that i begin to hate change. things seem to take me way too long to get over.

there is a For Rent sign on my house now. it went up yesterday. that was weird. i can't believe its really happening. it's official.. that sign proves it.

now everyone knows. it's as if that sign just opened up our lives for everyone to see. it might as well read "Our dad moved out and now we are poor and have to move."

well atleast our new house isnt a piece of shit with paint chipping off of it.. surrounded by houses that look like skyscrapers compared to ours... oh wait.. nevermind... that is my new house. ha.

i am looking forward to living near people that don't let their children walk to Von's [the grocery store where everyone shops]... because it's "where poor people shop." my new neighbor across the street said that one.



..but my family needs to do this. it's for the better.


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tomorrow is our 10 month anniversary.

no one can ever make me as happy as he has made me in these past 10 months. he is seriously amazing and i couldn't have asked for anyone better than him. i found my mr. perfect.

i am so fucking lucky.

i look forward to spending the rest of my life with him.

49 hit(s) (2 comments) |   

i've lost 13 pounds since September.

i am so proud of myself.

i wanted to lose weight and i finally did it.

just a few more pounds to go.

:-)

69 hit(s) (3 comments) |   
happy.



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58 hit(s) (1 comments) |   
pictures
Feeling: infuriated


He makes me soo fucking happy!
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My boyfriend is fucking hottt!

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Entry List
realization
blank
blank
the body i want
putting my parents up for...
fat fuck
stupid
not even 5 minutes later
fighting back tears
blank
blank
happy.
pictures
blank
Daddy
good for me
Portland
happy
perfection
:-)
over it!
don't call yourself my best...
omg its great!
blank
falling apart
i'm trying so hard not to...
my old house
my week [updated]
having funnn
PA
blank
blank
rannddomm
Britian
happy
job
:-)
blank
everything goes numb
fuck the weekend
i can't do this
bored.
depressed... again.
going down.
go ahead.
FUCK YOU!!!
his blog
blank
i can't wait
he looked at me like a chance...
Raymond never loved me
i love you more than life
Holiday
Warped Tour 2005
this house is not a home
so you say your into the same...
vacation = relaxation?
blank
hmm
i'm not patient
he's everything i want
i'm surrounded by fakes.
I'm in love
breaks always heal ♥
Memories
Britian, im sorry.
blank
you think i'm stupid
don't look at me
he is mine.. and i am his
<333
blank
Bastard
he's amazing
he loves...her.
blah
i really am stupid.
can i trust you this time?
blank
new boy <3
i think i'm home
Her name... is Jen.
Best Friends
you have no idea i'm hurting
i can't get you out of my head
never good enough
you're a fake.
blank
is it right?
Countdown
Seriously.
Insomniac
Better?
Naive
Dont Walk Away
July 30, 2003
Broken Hearts
Virgin
Naked