|
{121} pseudo kind |
December 15th, 2008 @ 5:42pm |
|
it the as the boy i fell in love with.
sitting right next to me.
its been what feels like ages since ive seen this boy.
his smile lit up the room.
i sat back and watched him work his magic around the room.
charming
he had the room under some laughter spell.
all i could do it stare.
with wonderment.
i love him.
----------
he only did it for me.
|
| 69 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{120} decemeber rain |
December 10th, 2008 @ 11:23am |
|
"nothing i ever do for you is good enough. All i ever want to do is make you happy and i can never do it. i try and try and nothing is ever good enough. you are are always criticizing me."
----------------------
he will never be like me. I will never be like him. when will i learn you can't change people?
-----
edit:
i wont learn. but thats okay. im happy we are two different people. thats why it works. we work. i am in love. i need to let it happen and quit pushing it away. this may never come again. i need to embrace. i will embrace.
|
| 28 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{119} david foster |
November 16th, 2008 @ 9:25am |
|
I love you.
|
| 83 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{118} roll over |
July 2nd, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
i can smell my skin baking.
little beads of sweat pour down my face.
the win blows through the tiny
hairs on the back of my neck.
i drift in an out of my slight coma.
the sun is seeping through my
eye lids burning the retnas.
its calm and quiet.
wind, nature, and silence
all in my ear at the same time.
i am at peace with myself.
------------
o what summertime tanning can do. |
| 184 hit(s) |
(2 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{117}murderish |
June 26th, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
i really fucked up.
bad.
im a bitch.
a fucking bitch.
she was right.
i should tell the truth more often.
the truth shall set you free
i told him the truth.
i told him what happened.
it was hard.
how do you tell someone who you know loves you with all their heart
that you let someone kiss you.
and he doesnt hate me.
he does not hate me.
hes upset. (yes)
hes sad. (very much)
hes disappointed. (more than ever)
i let him down.
i let myself down.
i dont deserve someone so amazing, and loving in my life.
he deserves better.
im trash.
and i realize that.
i murder what could of been the best relationship of my entire life.
------------
im gonna marry that boy someday |
| 36 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{116} full service |
June 14th, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
i just want him to leave me alone.
dont call me.
dont talk to me.
just leave me alone.
all he does is drink
and act like a total
asshole.
just leave me alone |
| 55 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{115} rental fund |
June 10th, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
ive paid for everything on my own.
i never asked for anything.
i worked my ass off everything i have.
and its not much.
im in extreme debt.
i work a shitty job.
ive been pretty much on my own since i was 15.
i pay my cell phone bill.
i pay my car insurence.
i pay for my gas.
i buy my own clothes.
shoes.
food.
i lived on my own 2 times.
i do my own laundry.
i wipe my own ass.
i made the mistake of moving back home.
---------------
i did my parents a favor a let them claim me on their taxes to save them 100 bucks. they cheated me out of 300 bucks and now i dont get my stimulus check because i let them claim me. now im out another 533 bucks. petty. |
| 41 hit(s) |
(0 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{114} memorex |
May 25th, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
last night = love.
drinks.
shots.
cigs.
corn hole.
family.
friends.
music.
5 am sleep overs.
finding out more things about myself and the people i surround myself with.
------------
my life is turning around
|
| 42 hit(s) |
(1 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{113} purell |
May 20th, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
i feel myself becomming addicted to them.
i want them everyday.
all day long.
when i dont get them,
im angry.
uneasy.
displeased.
stressed.
pissy.
but when i get them.
i dont even remember taking them.
they just slide down with
the vodka so well that
its like it never happend.
then i become a noodle.
everything blurry.
like strobe lights.
im happy again.
nothing can ruin me being happy.
im content.
----------
im on xanax |
| 68 hit(s) |
(2 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
|
{112} spoiled milk |
May 13th, 2008 @ 12:00am |
|
my life has become chaos.
out of control.
bruised.
i feel a downward spiral comming soon.
i bring myself
bad karma.
i feel as though it will
come and bite me in
the ass soon.
i need to change.
-----------
someone please give me the strength to change myself and my life.
soon. |
| 78 hit(s) |
(4 comments) |
Hey B.I.G. boy
|
