it's been months. i'm single :D

i dont feel like hanging out with anyone i would normally hang out with. i feel like a big slug right now. maybe if i take a shower i'll feel better. i have nothing to do todayyyy what the fuck everything is so boring.

Ariel Easton

Mr. Cicalese

22 January 2009

8th Grade

My favorite memory was my first and last real vacation. I went to Disney world with my best friend at the time, Janet, and my parents. It was November 2004, so I was in 8th grade. I didn't choose this just becuase Disney world is the happiest place in the world, even though it is. I chose it because of the time I went, how different my life was, and the people I surrounded myself with. The vacation itself was amazing. It was only my second time being there, I felt sort of silly because I thought I was too old to really enjoy it. Being the big bad 13 year old I was. We stayed in this awesome hotel called shades of green, it was some sort of military hotel, my dad was in the national guard so we got to stay there real cheap.

We only stayed a week so got up very early everyday. Went to every spot there was to go to, we couldn't miss a thing. Janet and I were allowed to run off on our own though. Our favorite was epcot, with all the different cultures. I liked the japanese and chinese sections with all the cute nick nacks and japenese floural flower things. The first real rollercoaster Janet and I ever went on was in mgm. It was the rockn roll rollercoaster or something. It was a lot of fun. I think it wasn't so scary because it was dark the entire time. The freedom we had there made us feel big kids. We had known eachother since 3rd grade, and thought we'd be best friends forever, ya know be old and mature and all that good stuff. We weren't friends for much longer after this vacation. It dwindled and finally died at some point in 9th grade.

8th grade was awesome because things really weren't that complicated. At the time of course it seemed that way. As will this whole high school thing not seem so complicated in a few years. Sometimes I just feel like I was thrown into growing up too early. With the way people around me are now. I really haven't grown up though, I am the reason for the phrase, "I'd lose my head if it wasn't attached to my body." The point is I'm not friends with Janet anymore. When I got to high school we went in completely different directions. I wouldn't say I went down the wrong path, it's just one I sometimes wish I didn't turn down. Sometimes I wish that me and her were still friends, and that I didn't stay friends with some of the people I'm still friends with from 8th grade.

i'm so sick of my life. everything is the same shit all the fuckin time.

hearts slipping apart

not getting smart

dont know what to dooo

still got his poopy shoooee

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||| 18% Stability |||||| 30% Orderliness || 10% Accommodation |||||||||||||| 58% Interdependence |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Intellectual |||||||||||| 42% Mystical |||||||||||| 50% Artistic |||||||||||||| 56% Religious || 10% Hedonism |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Materialism |||||||||||||||||| 76% Narcissism |||| 16% Adventurousness |||||| 23% Work ethic || 10% Humanitarian |||||||||| 36% Conflict seeking || 10% Need to dominate || 10% Romantic |||||||||||| 50% Avoidant |||||||||||| 43% Anti-authority |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Wealth |||||| 23% Dependency |||||||||||||||| 63% Change averse |||||||||||||||| 70% Cautiousness |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Individuality |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Sexuality |||||||||||||||| 70% Peter pan complex |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Family drive |||| 16% Physical Fitness || % Histrionic |||||| 23% Paranoia |||||||||||||||||||| 83% Vanity |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Honor |||||| 30% Thriftiness |||||||||| 36% Take Free Advanced Global Personality Testpersonality test by similarminds.com

and i miss summer and this bear

summer is gooooooooood

& moan

it happens to everyone i'm guessing. does someone out there have any advice?

i understand why he doesn't like her, she's not a likeable person to some. but notice, she's not just an aquaitence, she's my best friend. and he makes it so hard. like today after school i said goodbye cause i was going to hang out with victoria, my best friend. said i love you, and he doesn't even say it back. what the fuck is that? is it nothing? thats what i'm thinking. but i found out later on that he's actually mad over nothing. i was walking away with victoria and josh egan who is friends with my both my boyfriend and victoria. my boyfriend offers to smoke josh up, just kind of like a hand signal, like hey wanna blaze? and josh is lkje oh give me a minute guys. so obviously that pisses off victoria because she knows he's just doing it to make her mad. the thing is why does he have to go out of his way to do that? doesn't he realize that it makes me more sad than mad? i guess i really have to show him that

but none of this matters. it all boils down to the fact that i went to a rave, when i knew he didn't want me to, with victoria. and it bothers him to no end. i really fucked up and things are never going to be the same because i had to go. i felt like i was getting held back, it freaked me out. so i went. fuck it. its over now. i fucked up. i always seem to fuck up. and now i all iw ant to do is cry. and cry. becuaase i love him so fucking much and i hurt him. i just feel like a complete shithead. he's never intentionally hurt my feelings. augh GOD AISEF;LJWKJF WAIEOUYMTIAWJAWKLTJEFAW EF